My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009) (Rated-R)

Reviewed by:
Drew Stanczak





Quick Run-thru
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10 years ago, a man massacred a whole slew of teens, this year he is back.

What Drew Thought
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Ok lets get this straight.... this is nothing like the orignal, which is one of my favorite slasher films ever. But, in that, it does not mean its bad by any means. It never tried to be something it wasn't. It was a mindless slasher, And it knew it.
The movie was just plain fun to watch. Get over the fact that some of the deaths were funny. THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE! You need to just sit.... and enjoy.

ACTING
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It was all pretty good. Jensen Ackles played Tom Hanniger (the T.J. from the orignal) and he did it really nice. The only thing is that i keep seeing him as Dean Winchester. Jaime King was good for the most part as Sarah. And the new Harry Warden was pretty good too.(played by Richard John Walters) but it was very similar to the old harry warden.

GORE/VIOLENCE
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This film had the same amount of Ketchup as there is under owens bed. If you dont know owen, that means ALOT! It was so Ridiculously gorey that it was fun. i dont want to spoil anything.... but it was great.

LEVEL V - "Gorehounds will Cheer!"

NUDITY
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There is only one scene here. but it bares all. The scene is about 7 minutes long and follows a female character as Harry Warden chases her. very gratuitus.

LEVEL V - "When your naked, The killer can't snag your clothes."

DIRECTING
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Patrick Lussier was right on mark. He did fast, fun cuts. No creeping around here. when The Miner was coming for you, you saw him. and you knew how much time you had to live.... not long. He worked well for the 3d shots making them framed perfectly on the screen.

SOUNDTRACK
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Why can't i remember that part? must not have been stand out.

WHAT DIDN'T I LIKE?
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-The Ending
-The watered down story
-The worthless love triangle
-bizzare continuity errors
-no really. The terrible terrible ending. (its way different than the original)

COOL BITS
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-The 3D aniathrashed me.... it was great.
-To see Harry back on screen again.
-Could have been a sequel to the original.
-Stand up and cheer for the kills.
-Funny kills (on purpose)
-Harry's breathing.
-Super gorey.

FINAL VERDICT
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If you like 80's movies..... go see it..... please. and do it in REAL-D.
3/4 EBEDAS

Friday the 13th (2008) (Rated-R)

Reviewed by Drew Stanczak










Quick Run-thru
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In this new Outing to Camp Crystal Lake, Clay (Jared Padeleki) is searching for his sister who went missing one month ago. and of course, our hero, Jason (Portrayed this time by Derek Meers) Wants to kill. Thats all.
As far as remakes go, THIS IS NOT ONE! it very well could have been part 11 in the series! (part 12 if you count Freddy vs. Jason)

What Drew Thought
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Honestly.... If you didn't enjoy this movie even the slightest..... there is something wrong.
For the people who say that it ruins the series or, it doesn't take itself seriously.... REALLY GUYS? REALLY?
Well I have a little story for those people. once upon a time, Year 2001 to be exact, our friend Jason,
went on a little trip. You know where he went? Do you know? HE WENT TO OUTER SPACE PEOPLE! OUTER SPACE!!!!!!!! If that isn't breaking the ridiculousness barrier right down to the ground, then i must be dreaming. To be honest.... What did you expect. Why did you go see it? not for a deep storyline.... not for huge twists..... you went there to see JASON KILL PEOPLE... AND KILL THEM IN CRAZY WAYS! in that sense... the movie delivers. it delivers bigtime.
Anyway..... i liked it.... alot in fact. So if you want to make yourself like this movie better, do yourself a favor. Go watch part V then watch "Jason Goes to Hell" it will make you love this movie. Oh, and as for those people saying "Jason wasn't even the killer in the first one, Why is he in the remake?" well get this. Jason IS Friday the 13th. and the RE-IMAGINING was of part II-IV. People were standing and cheering for our boy. IT WAS HIS MOVIE! So give it a chance GO SEE IT!

ACTING
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All the acting was pretty cheesy here. but what do you expect? Though, Jared Padalecki (Clay) did do a great job. Still though, He always seems to play the "Sam Winchester" role. I also really liked Aaron Yoo (Chewie) as the comic relief. and if im not mistaken, he is the first asian in a F13 movie. Congrats. And last but not least, Derek Mears played the new Jason pretty well, he was more like... a scary wolf like hunter, while Kane Hodder's Jason was a more like an Eerie Hulking Bearlike hunter. I personally am partial to Kane's, more Eerie Jason.

GORE/VIOLENCE
----------------------
All the kills were shown onscreen here, Suprisingly light on the Ketchup for being a new age horror film. But, all is well. Certainly went for the "Look how Cool Jason is" more than the "Look how bad he can Mutilate someone"

LEVEL III - "Not Your Little Sister's Teen Movie"

NUDITY
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Considering they were going for the 80's throwback homage, you should expect some, and it Certainly is Gratuitis, moreso than any other F13 so far. Nothing too bad here though, just your normal unmotavated topless scenes.

LEVEL IV - "Don't Bring the Kids"

DIRECTING
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Marcus Nispel always does this to me... and i don't know why.... i don't jump in horror films but always at least once in a Marcus Nispel film. Basicly alot of the same hijinks from his 2003 Texas Chainsaw Remake. But he did up the ante alot here. Some real fast cuts and some really tense moments. I think that one day, he will be really astounding. but he needs to move on. he could do such better films (ones that his style fits, like more actiony movies)
Overall, i really dug him.

SOUNDTRACK
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Alot of the sam, Harry Manfredini's "Ki-Ki-Ki-Ma-Ma-Ma-" F13 theme is still intact, alot more intense music this time around, as there wasn't much creeping around, it was all in your face action scenes.

WHAT DIDN'T I LIKE?
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-Not enough gore.
-Light on cameos from older films (if any).
- Jason's Lair.

COOL BITS
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- A possible hint at a F13/TCM crossover film.
-THE ENDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-How to cook a sleepingbag (you will see).
-Jason looks so cool on a roof.



FINAL VERDICT
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GO SEE IT!
3.5/4 EBEDAS